February 28, 2008


To look at me today you'd not likely guess I was ever much of a swimmer. But awhile back, when pretense at the gym intensified to an intolerable toxicity, I abandoned dumbbells in favor of a Speedo. My proclivity for the pool lasted a good year or two.

I'm older now and while I've grown to dismiss infantile attitudes, weight-training's beginning to wear and the gym scene’s gotten stale. I thought it was time to shake things up again.

So Friday evening I hit the saltwater swimmin' hole down at the Y. Surprise-surprise: I managed thirty laps. Yippee me.

Guess I’m still a strong swimmer. But alas, the technique's lacking (frankly, it always has and probably always will). My front crawl is more like a lateral sweep.

I’ve been known to unwittingly smack other swimmers next to me. See, I don't glide through the water like an otter. I'm more bearish, awkwardly floundering about. The swimming gets done but not without much clumsy, seemingly uncontrolled movements.

People get to know my style and they avoid my lane. I guess that's nothing to be proud of, but it pleases me anyway. I like my space and I don't care how I secure it.

True to form, I clobbered one uninitiated young fella in a pair of maroon trunks on Friday. Poor kid couldn't have known know any better. Later the maroon trunks hovered outside my shower stall, tugging on his member. But that's for another post.


The Bum said...

JoeMyGod and Father Tony both spoke quite highly of you yesterday afternoon in Miami Beach. The context is somewhat (very) murky to me now.

michael sean morris said...

It's good to shake up the training occasionally; mine tends to go seasonally, especially if certain seasons tend to preclude the outdoors.

TankMontreal said...

bum: Murky or otherwise, I'm just glad you remembered enough to pass this on. I'm flattered - they're my blog heros!

msm: So true. Variety's as important as the weight you use or the amount you exercise.

Father Tony of the Farmboyz said...

Ordinarily, those who strike others in the pool never realize the fact that they flounder such. It's interesting that you do. I was almost knocked unconscious by one such who claimed it was my own fault for not looking out for his "wide stroke". PS: It's good to vary the routine every year or so, isn't it? And yes, your name was well invoked in Miami Beach.

The Bum said...

Still waiting for "another post." (kidding) Seriously, besides the fact that when you appear on my RSS feed I know I'll get to see that hot photo in the sidebar again, it's always a pleasant surprise to see you've posted. You should do it more often.

Ged-I said...

define "clobbered"
lest my titilation be trumped with tension

i know you ahve a soft spot for aliteration dahlin'

Mark in DE said...

Hmmm, hope you tell the story of the guy in the maroon trunks, tugging his member outside your shower stall. Photos would be nice, too.

Mark :-)

BigAssBelle said...

please do tell about the maroon trunks . . . ?